Punishment Makes It Easier For People To Forgive
ByPunishment may play an important role in forgiveness, according to a recent study.
Researchers from the University of Adelaide in Australia found that it is easier for people to forgive someone who has done wrong if some form of punishment is involved.
"Justice and forgiveness are often considered to be opposites, but we've found that victims who punish their offender are more able to forgive and move on," Peter Strelan, researcher at the university of Adelaide's School Of Psychology, said in a statement.
For the study, researchers arranged a range of different scenarios involving someone who has done wrong -- a negligent friend; a criminal offender; and a troubled personal relationship.
Based on their findings, people were more willing to forgive if those who had offended against them had been punished in some way.
Strelan said punishment could take many different forms. It could be giving someone the "silent treatment", which in itself is a very powerful psychological punishment. Or in the case of a criminal offender, knowing that a court of law has imposed a reasonable sentence and that justice is being done -- that may be enough for some people to forgive.
"That sense of justice, or getting 'just deserts', is important," he said. "However, in interpersonal relationships punishment should not be extreme or vengeful -- if it were, this would not help to repair the damage in the relationship and is likely to make things worse."
For forgiveness to really work there must be a sense that negative responses towards a transgressor are being replaced with positive ones. Punishment should be about responding constructively and doing something about people's poor behavior in a way that works for both parties involved in the conflict, according to Strelan.
Forgiving someone who has done wrong is difficult.
"When you get hurt by someone you naturally feel vulnerable, and the very idea of forgiving someone also makes a victim feel vulnerable. When some form of punishment is involved, the victim feels more empowered by that and is more able to forgive," Strelan said.