We have it all figured out: life. What we are supposed to do. Who we are supposed to marry. Where our children will go to college. How we are to retire and what time dinner will be served.

However, life has a strange way of reminding us that we are not always in charge. Some of these pitfalls we find ourselves in can be some of the darkest times of our lives.

Car accidents, death, and divorce, can be traumatic and change the trajectory of our lives in a matter of moments. 

Each of us deals with hardship in different ways. Here are a few insights to learn if you ever find yourself in a thorn filled patch of life that you might need help getting through.

Personal Injury

There is nothing like not being able to walk or hold a fork with our hands that reminds us of the value of having an able body. 

Time is of the essence when you are injured in a car accident or any other health-compromising event. The first priority should be your immediate state of health. Get to the hospital and get treatment. The longer you wait, the higher the risk of sustaining permanent damage.

If the accident was caused by somebody else's negligence, get a personal injury lawyer. Find a lawyer that cares about you as a person and not just a case. You can find out more with a quick search online.

A friendly face and a few kind words can go a long way when in need of physical recovery and financial compensation, especially if the damages have a lifelong impact on your health and ability to provide for your family.

Death

Losing someone, even in old age, is something for which we are never truly prepared. 

The Tibetan monks have long meditated on death and view it as something as natural as birth. They believe in the duality of existence. The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying lends deep insight into how to live a meaningful life and how to deal with death when the time comes. 

Some of the greatest minds have learned death is what gives life meaning. Our time on this planet is limited, and we are reminded not to squander even minutes.

It's also important to be kind to others because it's often relationships gone bad that people regret most on their deathbed. People will remember you by how you treat them, just how you remember people vividly for the way they treat you.

Speak your mind to your loved ones, so that you have the peace knowing they are loved and that you care deeply about them. 

Divorce

With the divorce rate over 50% in the United States, it's a wonder we do not recognize divorce for the painful experience it is as a society.

Hollywood movies often depict how easy it is to fall in love, but rarely are we ever told that falling out of love is also natural. It is all part of the polarity of life. Henry David Thoreau once wrote, there is no remedy for love but to love more.

Unlike the dead, the divorced are still living. TV shows like Sex in the City have turned divorce into a theme one can get over by the end of a one-hour episode. There is no deadline for heartbreak. Some people never mend their broken hearts, even over a lifetime. However, there are ways to stave off the fear of loving again.

Be kind to yourself, and try to find your passions all over again. Reconnecting with the child within will help you re-discover what made your heart pound with joy before you ever knew your partner walked the planet.

Also, helping others is a sure way to help you find love, compassion, and joy in life once again.

Turning the Dark Into Light

It's often those testing moments that bestow upon us our greatest transformation. No one escapes death, and all of us have had our hearts broken. We have all suffered sickness, and some of us have even lost our dreams.

When the currents of time roar with violence, we find ourselves most challenged. It's heartbreak that leads to poetry. Losing that teaches us to appreciate what we have when we have it. It is only when we are bedridden that we genuinely value our ability to walk.

When tragedy strikes, it's crucial never to lose hope of what we are to gain from that experience, although at the time, it's the last thing we are capable of perceiving.